Screw abstinence. Carry condoms!

Picture this: You’re young. You’re in love. You remember–dimly!–that you were told to just say no. And at the time, you did, with all good intentions…but that was before you found love. Love has a way of making all other intentions evaporate. And now it’s down to that crucial moment: do you say yes or no to the one you love?

Now, if this were the United States, you’d be screwed. In more ways than one. It’d be either go on saying no–against your will!–or else have sex woefully unprepared.

But ah, my friends, this is Colombia. And get a load of what could be in store for you:

Colombian teenagers could be forced to carry condoms in an effort to stop unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases.

The man proposing the scheme says men over the age of 14 in the town of Tulua should have to carry condoms, just as they carry ID cards, or face a fine.

“The measure does not force anyone to have sex, but to protect themselves,” Councillor William Pena told El Tiempo.


Last year, 14 people died in Tulua due to sexually transmitted diseases.

This shows an increase of 50% from 2003, according to figures published by the daily.

“This is a country with a lot of sexual activity and Tulua is no exception,” Mr Pena told El Tiempo.

Hence, the proposed condom law. So far, so sensible…right?

Well…not everybody feels that way:

Father Jesus Velasquez, however, describes the proposals as absurd.

“It would be like selling guns on the streets,” he said. “What is needed is education and respect for moral and Christian values.”

As I recall, isn’t it a deficiency in education, brought on by a funny interpretation of moral and Christian values, that brought about the need to carry condoms in the first place? After all, Father…these kids didn’t just catch STDs because they had sex, they caught them because they had sex with an infected person, minus a condom. Clearly, being told not to have sex didn’t make a lick of difference to them, when it came right down to that crucial moment.

Screw abstinence; a condom’s still your best bet if you’re not a celibate priest (as most of us are not). Values change, but facts don’t. And it’s an influx of unpleasant facts that’s forcing old, insupportable values to change, Father…whether you like it or not.

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