Human Enema Nozzles: That was the week that was…

Ahem. Before I get into this week’s barrel-o-bile, I just thought I’d share a little something that Jim wrote at The Scarlet Pimpernel. Something that made me sad, and made me rethink the whole notion of trying to be noble:

Sorry, I had to do ‘Bina’s Snarkiness of the Week since she went an got all serious on us. I really liked the cat that told people how to go away, too. And, since Otto went all Hollywood on us trying to get an Oscar….Oh, it wasn’t an Oscar?…Oh, I get it, People’s Cholce… NO? ..But they said something about the best analyst in a supporting role!…Well, whatever… I wanted to get some snarkiness in of my own. BoRev has been having too much of a free ride since ‘Bina and Otto went and got all serious and respectable on us. 🙂

Serious? Respectable? Moi??? Non, non, NON!!! Ceci n’est pas un blogue respectable! Ceci n’est pas un blogue sérieux! Ceci n’est pas le snarque, ceci est la fouquetarderie!!! Tabernac!!!!11onze!!!

Ahem. Now that I’ve got THAT off my chest, here’s who’s in dire need of a flip-off this week.

1. That fucking whiny-ass little right-wing cretin who refers to himself as “Ace of Spades”. He’s not an ace of anything, except maybe self-pitying sexism, and trust me, that shit don’t go down well with the ladies, any more than that other shit, namely Ace himself, will go down (well or otherwise) ON them. If you scroll down well into the comments, to about #237 or so, you’ll see I have some sound advice for guys like him. But really, it would do the ladies far more favors (sexual and otherwise) if “Ace” and all the rest of his unsexy ilk simply fucked off.

2. Krishna Fucking Urs. If you don’t want someone like, say, the president of Bolivia saying nasty things about how your country has been interfering in his country, the logical thing to do would be to stop the interfering, no? Well, no. Not according to this Krishna dude. To him, the logical thing to do is walk out and not listen to the unattractive truth. If you’re gonna be that way, pal, the best thing to do is just fuck off out of the country and quit the diplomatic corps too. DIPLOMACY–Urs doin it rong!

3. Abe Fucking Foxman. Another one who can’t handle even a little truthiness. Especially where Israel’s actions in Gaza are concerned. Someone please remind him that human rights are for everybody, not just those who fancy themselves a Chosen People. And if he can’t handle the reminder, he can fuck off.

4. Shitfuck and his fucking cronies. A whole rogues’ gallery in one little item? Shit, yeah. And doesn’t the air smell cleaner now that they’re FINALLY in the process of fucking off?

5. Those fucking Venezuelan oppo leaders (they know who they are) who went to meet with a certain US diplomat in Puerto Rico. How much did he pay them to interfere with the upcoming referendum on February 15, and what exactly was he paying them to do? I’m sure we’ll find out when Eva Golinger files the FOIA request. And she might just get it back sooner under Hopey’s new directives. If so, it’s gonna be extra sweet to watch their feces hit the fan. Meanwhile, they too can fuck off. (Especially the one who told off that cute journo-dude from Avila TV. Is that any way to talk to one’s betters?)

6. Larry Fucking Kudlow. And all you other fucking supply-siders and John Fucking Galt wannabes. Your time is OVER. Your credibility is SHOT. Your pontifications are hereby consigned to whatever circle of Dante’s hell is dedicated to liars, damned liars, and bad statisticians. Now fuck off!

7. Lisa Fucking Schiffren. So, Rev. Lowrey’s benediction reminded her of the kind of rhymes posted over California’s potties during a water shortage? Well, here’s a rhyme for Lisa: If the ‘winger bitch is white, she’s a big fat piece of shite. Pee-pee, ca-ca, doody-oody-doo. Please flush, and don’t forget to wash your hands. And fuck you very much, Lisa.

And finally, to all the usual suspects–namely, those whose virgin eyes I’ve gouged out here. If you don’t like it, I have nothing to say to you that these folks can’t say better.