Wankers of the Week: Forgettance Day edition

Yes, I know–a little late for Remembrance Day. Just like those below. Somebody, please, give these people a dose. Maybe then they’ll remember not to be such fucking wankers:

1. Mika Fucking Brzezinski. Looks like she inherited one thing from her old man: a knack for giving out turds highly polished to look like brilliant advice. (His “advice” to Jimmy Carter is what turned Afghanistan into the ungovernable hell-hole it is today.) Her “great life advice” for young women and girls? Get married, make babies before you’re thirty-five (because everyone knows your ovaries will dry up overnight once you’re past that sell-by date, right?), but don’t worry about having a career in place to support those costly kids first (or to fall back on should your marriage fail), because jobs are easier to find than husbands.

So, what’s Mika’s problem? It’s multifold: She forgets that decent, well-paid jobs are actually almost impossible to find now (unlike men, who comprise half the world’s adult human population.) She also forgets that anything that takes away your “edge” (such as waiting to re-enter the workforce because you preferred to be married and have kids) is gonna make it that much harder to get anywhere, much less where you want to be. She also forgets that some of us heard all this “advice” and rolled our big brown eyes at it more than 20 years ago!

2. Mark Fucking Noonan. For forgetting that TORTURE DOES NOT WORK. Read about this remarkable interrogator if you don’t believe me. He found out something that should be required reading in every high school history class: Reliable intelligence can only be obtained if you question people with humanity and respect. He got truthful answers out of them every time. Something which Noonan–apparently suffering from historical amnesia, as well as just plain being a right-wing dumbass–has conveniently forgotten. Or maybe, like a “good” torture victim, he’s just programmed to spout junk automatically. You know what they say–Garbage In, Garbage Out!

3. John Fucking Boehner. Lemme see if I got this straight: Ol’ Man-Tan has spent 19 years squatting in the United States Congress, and he thinks a healthcare bill is “the greatest threat to freedom I’ve seen” in all that time? Either he hasn’t seen much, or he’s forgetting something–like, oh, say, the USA PATRIOT act.

4. Rupert Fucking Murdoch. He must be getting senile in his old age, because he’s forgotten that you can’t own the entire fucking Internets, much less make ’em pay you for your crap.

5. and 6. and 7. Gary Fucking Jackson, Cofer Fucking Black, and Erik Fucking Prince. How much blood money is Blackwater paying to Iraq? Not nearly enough. Bastards are still turning a tidy profit. Bet they’ve forgotten the names of all the Iraqis they’ve killed…if they even knew them to begin with!

8. Lanny Fucking Davis. He still doesn’t remember who’s the real president of Honduras. Or that elections called by a dictator are not democratic. Or that he himself is a fucking douchebag.

9. Pat Fucking Robertson. He forgets that Islam IS a religion, and a rather large one at that (covering about one-sixth of the Earth’s population, give or take a bit.) He also forgets that his brand of “Christianity” is NOT a religion–it is fascism, and a not-so-“fringe political movement” in the US. Hmmm, let’s see how he likes being treated to a taste of his own medicine for a change.

10. Orly Fucking Taitz, yet again. No, the trashing of her stupid “birther” lawsuit hasn’t deterred her from airing her convoluted stupidities and bogus “evidence”. She still forgets that having Hussein for a middle name does not make one a Muslim. She forgets that Barack Obama was in fact born in Hawaii. She also forgets that she could end up getting her racist ass deported back to Moldova if she keeps this nonsense up. There’s also the question of how legitimate her law licence is, and she forgets that as well.

11. Alexander Fucking Wiens. Finally, we know who “Alex W.”, the murderer of Marwa al-Sherbini, is–because he’s now a convict. He insists that “his actions were not premeditated and that he had no xenophobic motivation.” O RLY? Then why did he call her a terrorist (for wearing a hijab) and bring a knife into the courtroom when she sued him for harassment? Seems to me he’s forgetting those salient little details…

12. Sarah Fucking Palin, AGAIN. This time, she forgets that her “death panel” assertions, long debunked, are true only for Big Insurance. She’s also forgotten that “bogus” does not mean what Bill and Ted used to think it meant! In fact, she forgets an awful lot of things, and so does her ghostwriter, who also can’t fact-check for shit.

13. Col Fucking Allan. For forgetting that women and minorities are human beings with equal rights, and also for forgetting to keep his tiny, shrivelled dick in his pants.

14. Abby Fucking Johnson. Someone forgot why she was pro-choice and worked for Planned Parenthood. Conveniently fast, at that. Was it really a road-to-Damascus conversion, has she got Stockholm Syndrome, or was she an infiltra
tor all along?

15. Carrie Fucking Prejean, again. Liar, liar…how does the rest of it go? I bet she forgets. She doesn’t remember that the Bible doesn’t say anything about boob jobs, either way, but it does say a great deal about vanity. She also forgets that acting like a complete fucking snotball isn’t pretty!

16. The fucking hypocrites at the RNC. Who knew that they liked elective abortion–well enough to buy insurance from a provider that covers it? Or did they just forget to read the fine print?

17. The fucking IOC. For forgetting that women are equal to men under Canadian law–and really, denying them the ski-jump? How many other events use that venue, anyway?

18. The snotty fucking “pro-lifer” (note the quotation marks) who trolled here claiming to be a Jew and a nurse (see “her” e-mail addy.) Yeah, right. If you were what you claim to be, you would have to know your medicine AND your history better. You forget that the Nazis were VERY “pro-life”, to the point of ordering German women to breed, and kidnapping children they deemed “adoptable”. Many modern-day adoption agencies, especially religious ones, take remarkably similar tactics. And no, Jews looking to adopt were not exempt either. They, too, have been guilty of wanting perfect white babies to adopt at any cost. Yeah, preach to me about “eugenics”…I’m sure you know all about it. Enough to confuse abortion with genocide, like I’ve never heard THAT one before. Pray tell, where does it say that abortions will be provided to wipe out any given ethnic group? Or that the purpose of abortion is the same as that of the Lebensborn–to provide only perfect little white “Aryan” babies? Come on “Marie”, show me the evidence (hint: NOT from a “pro-life” historical-revisionist site)…or just shut the fuck up. Your choice! You wouldn’t want to make this list again, would you?

And finally, the apologist for the Uruguayan dictatorship who shat on this entry here, yesterday morning. He claims he knew what it was like, but he forgets some rather obvious things because he defends those evildoers. Which makes me wonder where he’s really from. You could write to him and let him know what you think of his rudeness at the e-mail addy he so courteously left, but I doubt you’d get an answer from the anonymous coward; my spidey-sense tells me the addy’s fake.

BTW, he’s writing from 139.78.127.124, which my IP locator tells me is in Stillwater, Oklahoma. Say, dude, does Oklahoma State University know that you’re using their computer system to defend fascism? Would you like them to know? Because I can certainly get in contact with their administrators at any time. And my fingers are very itchy, thanks to the fact that I’m reading the most interesting book right now.

And I’m in no mood to suffer you fascist fools gladly.

Good night, and get fucked.