Who hacked the US election? Someone did, but…

…it’s not who you probably thought:

That’s right, it wasn’t the Russians. It was the FBI. Specifically, BushCo’s designated FBI director, James Fucking Comey. Hacking it, in short, on behalf of Donald J. Drumpf, illegitimate PE(e)OTUS.

And it’s so appalling that even some Republicans are raising the alarm over it. The most prominent one? John McCain, who was not in the Republican leadership race this past year. So you can’t very well say it’s just the Dems who were “sore losers”. Or “Crooked Hillary”. Or even Repugs who were sore losers. McCain, remember, is a non-runner.

And most telling in this whole Dirty Donnie Dossier scandal? Drumpf himself is denying it in the most awkward way imaginable:

“It’s made up. Never existed. Never happened,” Trump continued, speaking specifically about the unverified report regarding the prostitutes. “And the reason I say that so strongly because nothing is ever going to show up. There’s never going to be a tape that shows up. There’s never going to be anything that shows up. Now, I would be very embarrassed if a tape actually showed up, saying something like that. It would be double embarrassed because I’m saying there is no tape. There is no event. I was never even in that room for that period of time.”

So…he WAS there, and he DID specifically order call girls to wet the bed while he watched, and it’s all down on tape too, but…at another time than the one claimed? Okeydokey, Old Smokey.

Also worthy of note:

“It started with the Republican Party when they tried to beat me in the nomination and it went on. The Democrats took over the work, supposedly,” Trump continued. “And by the intelligence giving it credence by just even talking about it — it was very inappropriate. So I don’t know who the leaker was. I have no idea, but it’s fake news.”

So it’s fake news, but it was “leaked” and he doesn’t know by whom, but it was obviously one of his own rivals from within the Republican party? Okay, Donnie, whatever you say.

Lord knows you can’t even keep your fake stories straight for shit.

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