Headline Howler: FUX Snooze finally gets an accurate chyron

Finally, FUX Snooze accidentally lets slip just how useless and worthless their crap is. Makes sense really, since it panders to a literally dying demographic, namely cranky old white men who like to gawk at leggy young blondes.

But in response to the $0.64* question: Yes, families — and people without them — DO want to hear what the FBI is finding out about Drumpf and his illicit dealings abroad, and not just in Russia. What we don’t want, though, is a talking-bubblehead show crammed with stupidities about what we shouldn’t be watching right now. Like, for example, this:

The Security Moms are both a regular Fox News segment and an archetype that tends to pop up during elections: women who loves their families in a particular way that translates into endless military intervention and, as one lady on the panel put it brightly, “deporting illegals.” It does not involve that Russia stuff, and shame on you for asking.

“Why is the mainstream media harping on the Russia story?” asked Fox and Friends’ current blonde host, incredulously.

“Basically because it’s a way for them to undermine President Trump’s presidency,” one of the moms, Beth Parlato, explained serenely. (Parlato is also an attorney focusing on family law.) “They want to infer that he shouldn’t have won and he’s not their president. So they want to keep their story going. And personally I think the left needs to stop their whining. We all know that cybersecurity is an issue. It’s a fact that the DNC was hacked by Russia. so why doesn’t the left get onboard with President Trump and his administration and let’s work on —it’s a nonpartisan issue, the national security.”

“Let me just ask: are any of you concerned that President Trump, his campaign colluded with Russia to get elected?” the host asked.

“No,” they all responded in unison.

Wow. My IQ actually dropped a dozen points just reading that. And that was without me bothering to watch these ultra-basic, gum-snapping Valley Girls on the squawkybox. Good thing, too, as I can ill afford to lose any more brain cells.

It really is about time that tired old channel got a new tagline. How bout this? “FUX Snooze: Making Amurrica Even Stupider — er, GREAT AGAIN!”

Just trips off the tongue, that does.

*Amount adjusted for inflation.

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