Aim High

Posted on February 20, 2011 by Sabina Becker

Nothing can stop the US Air Force…

…except maybe a wall. A firewall, to be exact. A firewall made of forewarned, forearmed humans.

And yes, this is your forewarning, dear humans. They are seeking professional internet trolls, sockpuppets, and even the software with which to do it (they hope) undetected.

It’s hardly surprising that they would resort to disinformation over the Internet; one expects the worst of the world’s biggest military-industrial complex, especially when it’s losing the hearts and minds of the world. What’s amusing is that they’re actually advertising for it, not suspecting that they’re being watched by some very jaundiced eyes. And some internet-savvy ones, at that.

(And just in case that ad disappears, I have a screengrab saved. Clicky here to see it in full.)

Share this story:
Posted in Angry Pacifist Speaks Her Mind, Crapagandarati, Fascism Without Swastikas, Good to Know, Isn't It Ironic?, Karma 1, Dogma 0, The United States of Amnesia, The WTF? Files | Comments Off on Aim High

Music for a Sunday: I’ll have what he’s having!

Posted on February 20, 2011 by Sabina Becker

I don’t know what’s in that test tube, but having seen my share of withdrawn and morose drunks, I doubt very much that it’s booze.

Share this story:
Posted in Music for a Sunday | Comments Off on Music for a Sunday: I’ll have what he’s having!

Wankers of the Week: Dog days of democracy

Posted on February 19, 2011 by Sabina Becker

Ah, the dogshit days of late winter, when a chance February thaw reveals the debris that we’ve been counting on the snow to cover up, and hat hair starts getting to us all in a major way. The other day, during what felt like my first good walk since the snow started to pile up and you couldn’t go out without being hit by a snowplow, I saw a pile of dog turds and used Tetley round teabags by the roadside, uncovered by the plus-12ºC weather. (I fleetingly wished I had a camera phone, if only to record THAT for posterity.) Only my trusty tweed Tilley chapeau and my high coat collar kept the mock Chinook from ripping my hair into a tattered haystack. Not that I’m complaining; if my hair’s flyaway and the roadsides near my place are looking kind of rough, it’s nothing compared to the turdnuggets that these wankers have left when flying off at the mouth…or the keyboard:

1. Sara Fucking Landriault. Heaven forfend that working mothers should ever get a break from government. Or that this Blogging Suppository idiotess should see that the real reason our country is in a decline is due to conservative policymaking, not the “reign of terror” that is mothers working for a living (and having early childhood educators teaching stuff to their kids)!

2. Glenn Fucking Beck. If you use his website to do your homework, you deserve to flunk. You will doubtless emerge just as stupid as if you’d been home-schooled by Wanker #1. How appropriate, then, that this visibly deteriorating mental defective has decided to dredge up the phantom menace of…yeeek…EUGENICS!

3. Ralph Fucking Scurfield. All of a sudden, I’m glad that I’m not a ski bum. And that I don’t live or work in Banff.

4. Scott Fucking Walker. Not only did he try to make public-sector unions illegal in Wisconsin, this teabag-fer-brains has also threatened to call in the National Guard to shoot them. Whatever happened to “life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness”? Oh yeah, I forgot–only applies to the oligarchy, not the peons. PS: How are you liking your “Tahrir Square moment” now, eh Scotty?

5. Andrew Fucking Breitbart. Want a second black woman to sue you in as many weeks, Big Fucking Idiot? Keep it up. I hope Michelle Obama crumples you up into a squishy doughball and soccer-dribbles your sorry ass all over Washington. She could, you know. PS: I don’t think Shirley Sherrod has kicked said sorry ass nearly as hard as she could have, either.

6. Michele Fucking Bachmann. For one so obsessed with “Second Amendment solutions” to the imaginary problem of socialism (i.e. a black president), she’s remarkably silent about the fact that her own con-tard shindig was a gun-free affair. Odd, wouldn’t you say?

7. Cornelius Fucking McGillicuddy the Fourth, again. This time he wants a total embargo on anything that could send money to Venezuela! Hey Corny, how about starting with USAID, rather than CITGO?

8. Phil Fucking Jensen. If the largely flat and empty state of South Dakota suddenly loses half its population (the half that’s NOT flat and empty, of course), you’ll know who’s to blame. Why not just write misogyny right into your state constitution and be done with it, asshole?

9. Haley Fucking Barbour. Silence is consent. (Not that we didn’t already figure the guvnor of Mississippi for one hell of a racist anyway.)

10. Mike Fucking Huckabee. I’ll make your decision really simple for ya, Mike: DON’T RUN AGAIN.

11. Jeff Fucking Duncan. Typical Repug control freak, he thinks the US has the right to total control of SHARED borders with Canada and Mexico. Dude, please! You are not the boss of us. Canada and Mexico, like it or not, are NOT your Manifest Destiny, they are sovereign nations. Learn the concept before you open your piehole!

12. Pamela Fucking Geller. Don’t look for any sisterly solidarity from this deranged fruitbat on any front. She had no problem using the heinous sexual assault on Lara Logan to further her own fraudulent cause of islamophobia. As though white western men don’t do all the exact same things, for all the exact same reasons. As for that “Jew, Jew, Jew” shit, I think I’ll wait to see it from a more reliable source than the New York Post. Like, oh, say, Lara Logan herself.

13. Nir Fucking Rosen. Don’t look for any brotherly solidarity from this one, either. Blaming the victim? Have you no shame? BTW, your “apology” is also a wank. And very likely a lie, too.

14. Simone Fucking Wilson. “Consummated”? What a consummately stupid thing to say; she makes it sound like somebody’s wedding night. Here’s a helpful primer for all those of you who still don’t get it: Take out the word sexual from the phrase sexual assault. What are you left with?

15. Debbie Fucking Schlussel. Add her and Jim “The Dim” Hoft, alias the Gateway Pissant, to the anvil chorus of asshats who just don’t get what happened to Lara Logan. This wingnut is vomitous at the best of times, and this is not the best of times for her. But hey, it doesn’t matter. After all, it’s not like she’s being paid to do anything remotely resembling journalism.

16. Michelle Fucking Malkin. And another one for the anvil chorus, along with the Baby Jeebus and the Deranged Yoda Wannabe! Yeah, rape is really “business as usual for the Middle East”. Well, if it’s business as usual there, guess what–it is here, too. Ever seen the sex-assault rates in the US, Michelle? They’re nothing to be proud of. And they don’t compare favorably to Egypt’s, either.

17. Fucking “Curveball”. Now, when it can’t possibly do anyone any good, finally he tells the truth. And what was it? That he helped BushCo lie their way into the Iraq fucking WAR, what else? Like we didn’t know that from the start, for fuck’s sake. But let’s not try to pretend that he duped anyone. They were looking for someone to say that, and I bet they paid him well for it, too.

18. Jesse Fucking Watters. Here’s a couple of real professional tips for ya, Jess: Don’t wear stars and stripes together; it screams “TEABAG!” And don’t say “buddy” or “bro” to someone you dislike. It’s juvenile and insincere and makes you look like a smarmy little prick. Oh wait, my mistake–you ARE a teabag and a smarmy, juvenile, insincere little prick! Well, that changes everything. Lemme know when you guys decide to do some real journalism; I might tune in then. That is, if I’m not too busy watching paint dry or grass grow.

19. Michael Fucking Sanguinetti, alias Officer Slutty. Um, officer? There’s a reason “they” told you not to say that. Perhaps if you removed some clothes and thought about it, the answer might come to you…

…or maybe not.

20. Rush Fucking Limbaugh. Who’s the anti-democracy parasite again? Oh yeah: the one who oinks on the radio all the fucking time. He didn’t even register to vote until he was shamed into it–at 35. Which I guess tells you everything you need to know about the Pigman’s real feelings toward democracy!

21. Bryan Fucking Fischer. Funny how in far-right fundie-land, it’s always the bashers who are the real victims. Poor widdle oppressed things!

22. Ann Fucking Coulter. More jailed journalists, you say? I say, let’s start with the right-wing pundits who call (from the safety of their air-conditioned ivory towers, of course) for this sort of shit. That’s infringement on freedom of the press, and if I’m not mistaken, that’s illegal!

23. Stephen Fucking Harper. If this is what Canadian democracy is supposed to look like, we are in deep doggie doo-doo. And used teabags, slowly moldering in the roadside slush.

24. Bev Oda. Yes, I realize she’s just a loyal Harpocrat lackey doing her job. But then again, it was she who doctored that document, and she couldn’t even own up right away; she did the “Who, ME?” schtick until someone called her on it. Did Harpo tell her to lie about that, too? And if so, and she obeyed, what does that say about her?

25. Justin Fucking Bieber. “Everything happens for a reason”? Yeah, there’s a reason I’m not a Belieber, and won’t be until this kid shows some signs of acquiring a logic that goes beyond Grade 5 fundie theology. Which is pretty pathetic, actually, considering that he’s old enough to drive. At 16 I knew better than to say such things–but then, I had (closeted) gay friends and a healthy fear of rape (and a correspondingly healthy respect for abortion rights). Yeah, he’s right about our healthcare system being better, but that was a no-brainer; any Canadian can say that. It’s what else he said that I take issue with. Whether it’s gays or abortion, it’s obvious that he has no idea yet what he’s talking about. He really shouldn’t be asked to opine on those things. Which I guess makes whoever interviewed him for Rolling Stone a wanker, too.

26. Donald Fucking Rumsfeld. Why?

Apparently, he wrote a book. And we know why, too:

And finally, to whoever it was that dumped the teabags and dog turds by the side of the road: Next time, do it in your own front yard, asshole. And if you don’t like that, then shell out a bit extra for garbage tags, or learn to compost. Don’t think that just because a crummy old road is out of your way, no one’s gonna see what you did there.

Good night, and get fucked!

Share this story:
Posted in Wankers of the Week | 2 Comments

The Power of Nightmares, Part 1

Posted on February 19, 2011 by Sabina Becker

In light of current events in the Middle East (and US propaganda regarding them), I thought this little refresher course was in order. Note the eerie similarities between some of the ideas of the “father of US neoconservatism”, Leo Strauss, and the “father of Islamist terrorism”, Sayyid Qutb (who happens to be an Egyptian.) They’re not coincidences. Both thinkers have a distinct flavor of authoritarian cultism about them. And both have unleashed disaster upon the world through their philosophical influence.

But don’t discount Qutb’s insights altogether, either: He was quite right about certain aspects of the mental colonization which he saw as a reversion to jahiliyya, particularly those which make people think they are free when they are not. While I don’t share the religious viewpoint that Qutb wrote from (I am adamantly opposed to theocracies of any kind), I can still see that same plague very much alive in the US today, and to a lesser extent in Canada and other western “democracies”. Real democracy here is rapidly eroding while wave after wave of propaganda tells us the opposite–that we are the beacons of freedom that the rest of the world aspires to. Which of course begs the questions: If we are such beacons of freedom, why do we support leaders — in Egypt and elsewhere — who are anything BUT free and democratic? And conversely, why do we actively conspire against any leaders who ARE free and democratic? Can we afford to go on singing the praises of our so-called freedom when the chains around our own necks are growing ever tighter–and the real menace comes not from the media boogymen — Islamist terrorists, Latin American “autocrats”, etc. — but from our own (mis)leaders, who manipulate us so cleverly that we cannot see their authoritarianism for what it is?

Food for thought at your Saturday matinée, kiddies. Forgetting is forbidden!

Share this story:
Posted in Canadian Counterpunch, Fascism Without Swastikas, Huguito Chavecito, If You REALLY Care, Isn't It Ironic?, Rivers in Egypt, The United States of Amnesia | 1 Comment

Festive Left Friday Blogging: Full Moon Fever

Posted on February 18, 2011 by Sabina Becker

What a difference a week makes, eh? Looks like all the days of rage and revolution from the Middle East have migrated across the Atlantic to the US Midwest:

Yeah, that’s right…working Wisconsinites of the public sector are seriously cheesed off, and they’re walking out, sitting in, standing up, and shutting down.

And the sweetest part is, they’re doing it TOGETHER. Remind you of anything?

Yeah, that’s what it reminded ME of, too.

Democracy is coming…to the Middle East AND the USA. And not a minute too soon, either.

Share this story:
Posted in Festive Left Friday Blogging, Rivers in Egypt, The United States of Amnesia | 1 Comment

Confessions of a Racist Bitch

Posted on February 16, 2011 by Sabina Becker

I got unfriended on Facebook today by someone I’ve known for less than a week.

Big fucking deal, right? Happens all the time. Means she wasn’t really my friend to begin with, blah blah blah. True, true, and sad-but-true. And yet, it still bothers me. Because it’s not so much WHAT happened, as HOW it happened that makes it so damn painful.

So, here’s what happened.

I reposted a petition from HarrassMap’s page. It seemed the right thing to do; after all, Lara Logan was viciously assaulted in the midst of just doing her job, right? What could possibly be the harm in recirculating a petition from an Egyptian women’s page dedicated to stopping sexual harassment, assault and abuse in a country that, like all of them, has seen too much bullshit heaped on the heads of its female half of the population? What’s wrong with acknowledging a problem, in solidarity, on the social networking sites?

What, indeed.

This person jumped on me for it:

Sexual harassment has become FAR less prelevant since the revolution. This article is misleading. What happened to Logan was an isolated incident and must be seen within its context.

I responded:

Well, this is an opportunity to make sure it stays isolated, and that things don’t backslide. Also, let’s bear in mind that so far, the only authoritarian thug ousted has been Mubarak himself. His successor was also his torturer-in-chief. There’s a lot of housecleaning still to do.

The reaction:

True but using new ways not the old ways. I was just looking at the page 4 ‘HarassMap’, it’s a UN initiative! If you disregard the actual context then you will not be dealing with the Real problem. Things won’t backslide. I find the term ‘housecleaning’ offensive.

That’s when my first little inner warning flag went up; I saw that she was looking to pick a fight here. She was working with a number of naïve assumptions and just plain false facts.

For starters: HarassMap is NOT “a UN initiative”. Here’s its “about” page; as you can see, it’s strictly an Egyptian women’s volunteer initiative. Maybe they’re looking to work with the UN, and maybe not, but this is hardly something imposed top-down from without. I doubt I’d support it if it were.

And sadly, the revolution has not wiped sexual harassment or abuse from the streets of Cairo or anywhere else. Eons of entrenched machismo just do not melt away overnight, or even in three weeks of sustained protest. The world is steeped in sexism, and harassment, assaults and abuse happen EVERYWHERE. Even the most enlightened, progressive western democracies aren’t immune. That’s the actual context here. And yet this person tried to lecture me about “actual context”, as though I didn’t know what I was talking about. (She went on to say as much later.)

As for whether “housecleaning” is an offensive word, I’d agree if it were only one group (or gender) being forced to do it all. That’s hardly the case in Egypt. The sheer size and diversity of the demos made that obvious. It’s a big house over there, and a lot of crap to be cleaned, but it seems that an overwhelming majority of the people is taking on the task. So there’s nothing to get offended about here, as far as I can see.

But this person was determined to get offended, be offended and stay offended. You can’t argue with someone like that; all you can do is walk away. Which I did. I figured she just needed to cool off a bit, and that later, we could talk better. Mistake.

I thought that she could see that we were both on the same side. BIG mistake. She couldn’t. Duh! On the Internet, no one knows where you stand unless you tell them.

And some people seem hell-bent on arguing where you stand even when you do tell them, and refuse to take your word for it. They always think they know everything better, and think they know where you stand, better than you yourself do. If you try to tell them that they don’t, they get all huffy.

I sensed that this was going to be one of THOSE discussions. I’ve had more than my share of them, and I hate them. I hate myself every time I get pulled into one, and I have a hard time going on liking the person who pulled me into it, too. Such arguments always tire me out. They ruin the rest of the day for me, and they ruin me for the rest of the day. All I can do to prevent having my day ruined by one of those is to walk away from it, gain some perspective, and try to deal with it later. So that’s what I did.

BIG mistake.

I got this when I finally came back:

Thanks for ignoring my comments! Stop making assumptions about what’s going on here! You have no idea what you are talking about.

And then this:

Why don’t you respond 2 me you stupid idiot Sabina?! you’re so sure you are right! Or you just can’t handle someone disagreeing with your arrogant opinions!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You are not even able to respect one single person from Egypt!

And finally this:

Racist Bitch

And by then, her name was unclickable. She’d blocked me.

My friends, of course, defended me–or tried to. One of them, a Korean-American, could have told her just by a glance at his profile picture that I am no racist bitch. But this person, just as I’d suspected and feared, was utterly impervious to their attempts to reason with her. Any arguments I’d have had would have been an utter waste of time and energy. She was determined from the get-go to call me that, it seems, and she got to.

I did not, however, get a chance to defend myself as I would have if I’d only had the time. And the stamina. And a little more understanding and patience from this complete stranger. That hurts.

A week or less is not long enough to get to know anyone really well, on the Internet or off. There are people I’ve known all my life whom I still can’t rightly say I understand, even when I see them almost daily in real life. I think it’s pretty fair to say that if I feel that way about my so-called intimates, others must feel the same about me. So how would a not-a-week-old Facebook friend regard me?

Not with a whole lot of understanding, I imagine.

There are so many things about me that just don’t translate well to cyberspace. For that matter, there are a lot of things about me that are easy to miss even when we’re talking face to face! There have been times in my life that I’ve walked around in a major depression, borderline suicidal, and no one but me could tell that I was deathly ill. A part of me had died and gone to hell, and no one even saw. That’s scary. I could have killed myself and they’d all have been walking around with a shell-shocked look on their faces, saying things like “I had no idea…she never said…I couldn’t tell by looking at her…she seemed all right”, etc.

So just imagine, now, that you’re me, an introvert and occasional major depressive, trying to have this conversation. Could you have done it better?

Some of you probably could. Either you’re more extroverted than I (and I’m a terrible introvert, my online persona notwithstanding), or you’re better at arguing, or you’re better at simply never being misunderstood. (Those of you in that last category, I really fucking ENVY you. Could you bottle whatever it is you’ve got, and share it around? I could use a swig right now.)

(Or maybe you’re just better at not fretting and beating yourselves up over stupid people raising stupid arguments on stupid Facebook. In which case, I also envy you. Bottle that shit and gimme some!)

But even if you’re not better than me at this sort of thing, I hope you understand what I’m trying to say here. If I really were a racist bitch at heart, I’d have to go and do what they all do: say “Aha! I knew there was something wrong with THOSE PEOPLE!” and feel vindicated and retrench myself. As I guess this person did. I hope she feels better now.

But I don’t. I feel terrible. I blame myself for having brought it on.

And you know what that makes me want to do? THIS:

Which is exactly what I know I shouldn’t do, if I want anything in this world to change for the better. And I do.

So, no right-wing nutjob retreat into cozy racist delusions for me, and no satisfaction for my projecting accuser. There’s work to be done. Maybe this will help and maybe it won’t, but at least I’ve gotten it out of me now. Sometimes, that’s all you can really do, eh?

Share this story:
Posted in Confessions of a Bad German, If You REALLY Care, Just Pissed Off, Rivers in Egypt, Uppity Wimmin | 10 Comments

Cops Behaving Badly: How NOT to get new recruits

Posted on February 15, 2011 by Sabina Becker

Do I really need to elaborate on what’s wrong with this recruitment poster? Didn’t think so.

Share this story:
Posted in Cops Behaving Badly, Oceania, Stupid Sex Tricks | Comments Off on Cops Behaving Badly: How NOT to get new recruits

Found: One backbone. Location: Argentina!

Posted on February 15, 2011 by Sabina Becker

Cristina, you’ve done it again. Besitos:

Argentina has accused the US of trying to smuggle weapons and satellite phones into the country after cargo on a US military plane was seized last week.

Argentine officials say the material was not properly declared.

The US says the equipment was intended for a police training course in Argentina and has demanded its return.

Bilateral ties have cooled since it emerged US President Barack Obama would not be visiting Argentina during a forthcoming tour of the region.

Argentine Foreign Minister Hector Timerman on Monday sent a formal protest to the US embassy, demanding a proper explanation about the seized cargo.

“The United States must understand that they can’t send war materials without informing the government. And now they refuse to co-operate with the investigation,” Mr Timerman told CNN.

[…]

But US state department spokesman PJ Crowley said they were “puzzled and disturbed” by the actions of Argentine officials, who had conducted an “unusual and unannounced” search of the aircraft.

Mr Crowley said he had heard that one serial number had not been documented properly, an issue that could have easily been resolved.

“For whatever reason, it was elevated to higher levels of the government and we find this puzzling,” he said.

He said the US was calling for its equipment to be returned. The training course which involved US military experts and Argentine federal police and focussed on hostage rescue techniques had been cancelled, he added.

Well, that’s typical. Hope? Change? As far as imperialist foreign policy goes, the US is still the same old same old.

Undoubtedly that cargo (which included not only weapons and sat-phones but morphine) was intended for the kind of uses one might see in State of Siege, the sort of “police training course” that Dan Mitrione taught until the Tupamaros served him in Uruguay. His Barackness is no better than Dubya on this front, and the State Dept.’s “puzzled and disturbed” whining (shut up, PJ!) was to be expected; they’re used to getting their way. Used to be they could smuggle in all kinds of weaponry and torture devices in the so-called diplomatic pouch, and no one would dream of questioning it. It’s how they kept their local vassals in line. As Yves Montand, playing Mitrione’s character, Santore, in State of Siege, said: “Régimes come and go, but the police stay.” Which is why the State Dept. has such an active interest in “training” them. The local police, as we’ve seen from Ecuador, are those who wield the big stick when talking softly with the elected leadership doesn’t work.

But at least the countries who have long been on the shit end of that big stick are now grabbing hold of it and yanking it out of Uncle Sam’s hand. That’s new, and if kept up consistently by everyone, it might just be the change these countries have long hoped for. Certainly there seems to be no other way of bringing it about.

Share this story:
Posted in Don't Cry For Argentina, Ecuadorable As Can Be, Fascism Without Swastikas, Guns, Guns, Guns, Isn't It Ironic?, Isn't That Illegal?, Karma 1, Dogma 0, Obamarama!, Sick Frickin' Bastards | 1 Comment

Nothing is certain but death, part dos…

Posted on February 14, 2011 by Sabina Becker

Yep, that US healthcare system…truly the best in the world. Just ask Cuban immigrants:

Birgilio Marin-Fuentes had driven to Portland Adventist Medical Center shortly after midnight Thursday, unable to sleep or stop coughing, then crashed his car into a pillar and wall inside the first level of the hospital parking garage under an “emergency parking only” sign about 125 feet from the emergency room entrance.

By the time somebody noticed the 61-year-old Cuban immigrant in his car and told a police officer in the emergency room, about 20 minutes had gone by.

Officers Angela Luty and Robert Quick found Marin-Fuentes unconscious and unresponsive and began cardiopulmonary resuscitation. A third officer, Andrew Hearst, went to the ER intake desk and told them what was happening.

He was told to call emergency services.

“The officers recognized this man needed medical attention immediately, and two officers began CPR immediately, and a third officer went to ask for assistance, and they were told they had to wait until an ambulance arrived,” said Sgt. Pete Simpson, a Portland Police Bureau spokesman.

The problem is that this incident was treated as a car crash, when in fact it was a heart attack that led to it. In any case, telling someone to wait for an ambulance when the incident took place just steps away from a hospital emergency room is beyond ridiculous. Don’t they have gurneys there already? Or people who know how to deal with a car-crash victim?

Somehow, I don’t think this corresponds to the notion of a better life that this immigrant came from Cuba for.

Share this story:
Posted in Cuba, Libre (de los Yanquis), Economics for Dummies, If You REALLY Care, Isn't It Ironic?, She Blinded Me With Science, Socialism is Good for Capitalism!, The "Well, DUH!" Files, The United States of Amnesia | Comments Off on Nothing is certain but death, part dos…

Short ‘n’ Stubby: Love and the lack thereof

Posted on February 14, 2011 by Sabina Becker

It’s not that Ms. Manx has anything against love; after all, she’s a kitty, and cats are all about love. But the Stumpy Cat does have a problem with days like today and the attendant commercialization of emotion. So she’s been mousing around the intertubes, and as usual, her soft paws have ferreted something out:

First off, a few verses by George Orwell, to get us all into the right mood.

Then, in the spirit of those verses, a little something about all the crap we’re supposed to either buy or expect to have bought for us (depending on our gender, of course) on this otherwise blah mid-February day.

And from there, we proceed to a man that we Canadian ladies are supposed to be creaming our collective panties over, but who, strangely, leaves the overwhelming majority of us colder than a dead mackerel on a slab of ice.

(Okay, that last one was depressing. Here, have some music.)

Maybe you’d like some more perspective? All right, let’s talk symbols. This day is supposed to be replete with them, after all. Did you know you could get lead poisoning from Cupid’s arrowheads? It’s totally true!

And awww, how sweet…the Ford Brothers (mayor and city councillor of Toronto) have been buying roses for all the female council members. None for the dudes. Now, what secret floral message does THAT send? Homophobia and heterosexism, sittin’ in a tree–K-I-S-S-I-N-G? That is so romantic!

Or maybe it has something to do with this “every woman wants to be a princess” crap that we’re being sold 24/7/365, 366 in a leap year. Ms. Manx sniffs at that; she would have the world know that every woman, like every she-cat, is a QUEEN, thankyouverymuch. (And on that note, your humble queen is very glad that she’s never received any of these awful valentines.)

In any case, a bouquet of roses may not seem so romantic to you after reading this. Are thousands of poisoned women in Latin America really a fair price to pay for a dozen long-stems? Ms. Manx thinks not.

So how can you tell if you’re a feminist at heart? Read this. And learn how to see the reality of love, not just the hearts-‘n’-flowers crap. (The Stumpy Cat bids me tell you that “purrs and rubs mean it’s really wubs”. Sorry. That’s the closest I can get for a LOLcat-to-English translation.)

And just to yank the rug totally out from under the “prostitution is really love of women” nonsense, how about those Italian women, busting Berlusconi’s ass? What they’re doing right now is molto bella! Ms. Manx hopes this whole revolutionary anti-corrupto thing catches on outside the Arab world, and if Italy is the runaway train’s first stop, well…that’s amore!

Happy V-day, everyone.

Share this story:
Posted in Short 'n' Stubby | 1 Comment