Remember the other day, when Michael Moore did an emergency broadcast during the Capitol attack, and he was on the phone with his friend, Democratic congressman Dan Kildee from Michigan? And Rep. Kildee talked about what it was like to be under siege in his own workplace? Well, here’s a short video clip he took and sent to Michael during that siege:
Towards the end, you can hear various people saying “Take your pins off!” Those “pins” are the congressmembers’ identification badges. A normal workplace ID, in this case, had become a deadly liability, since the terrorists were out for blood. They had come there to capture and possibly kill congressmembers. Some of the terrorists had zip-tie handcuffs; there was a rough and rickety-looking gallows-tree out on the Capitol lawn, and I’m not convinced it was there solely as a symbol of the fascists’ discontent with federal politicians. That contraption was placed there with murderous intent. Even if it looks like it would have collapsed under the weight of an average adult, I’m sure that shoddy little scaffold was meant to be used, and that congressmembers — Democrats in particular — were its intended victims.
Even those who haven’t read the underground Nazi bestseller, The Turner Diaries, have probably at least heard of one particularly awful chapter of that novel. There is no doubt in my mind that the terrorists were planning to stage their own version of “The Day of the Rope”, and that Rep. Kildee and others like him were their intended prey. After all, these Q-fueled fools already believed that the Capitol housed a number of sexually terrorized “mole children” in its underground passages, and that the Dems were the abusers of said fictional children. What was to stop them from taking prisoners, and even extrajudicially executing them?
As it turns out, nothing…except their own fucking stupidity and incompetence.
Unlike their antifascist counterparts (and even the most complacent mainstream politicians in Washington), these Nazified knuckleheads were piss-poor organizers. They are no better at planning a paramilitary operation than they are at thinking in general, and that’s a mercy, because for once in their lives, they were perfectly situated to get away with murder. And not only that, but also treason and sedition.
And, oh yeah, also a SUPER-SPREADER EVENT.
Some people wouldn’t wish this disease on their worst enemies. But I am not some people. If you want to see democracy and your elected congressional colleagues die, you deserve no better than to go down with that ship yourself. You don’t even have to be my personal enemy; I’m going to ill-wish you for fucking over all the people you and I don’t even know. If you hate democracy, you can go fuck yourself, and you can do it with a splintery broomstick and no lube.
Yeah, surprise, it’s precisely the same thing as happened on a larger scale in the US Capitol a few days ago: It’s motherfucking TREASON. Fueled, as you may have imagined, by a gross misunderstanding of the concept of “citizen’s arrest”. No, you don’t get to do it to public figures you dislike; only to fugitives fleeing from the scene of an actual crime. And no, your FEELINGS that those political figures were criminals don’t count, either. But don’t take MY word for it; here’s our Criminal Code on the subject:
In most cases, you must find a person either in the act of committing a crime, or escaping from and freshly pursued by persons who have lawful authority to arrest that person, in order to lawfully make a citizen’s arrest. In particular, if you are arresting a person for an indictable offence, which is the most serious type of offence and includes violent offences, you can only make the arrest at the time you witness the person committing the offence. It is against the law to arrest a person after any lapse in time for having committed an indictable offence, unless it is relation to your property.
Whoopsie. Guess Corey Hurren didn’t take THAT into account.
And no, Parliament Hill is NOT his property, either. Nor is Rideau Hall. It belongs to all of us. And the overwhelming majority of us, including those legally tasked with maintaining law and order, don’t agree that the PM or the Governor-General deserve to be arrested by some random Q-adjacent gun nut who’s just mad that he doesn’t get to play with as many assault rifles in his private time as his widdle heart desires.
Yes, members of Parliament, up to and including the Prime Minister, are NOT exempt from the law, and can be arrested if found to have committed a crime. Same goes for the Governor-General. But here’s the kicker: Only the police get to arrest them. And only with a warrant, as is the case for any criminal. If you don’t have one, and you try to stage a “citizen’s arrest” on a non-fugitive member of Parliament, then maybe the one deserving to be arrested is YOU.
Especially not this man and this woman, who were coincidentally caught by a Norwegian news team as they made their objections known:
Just imagine if it were Black Lives Matter. Would anyone have opened the gates for THEM? (Rhetorical question. We already know the answer to that one, as well as the woman in the car does.)
…along with a friend who also just happens to hail from Flint, Michigan — namely, Rep. Dan Kildee:
Kildee doesn’t mince any words about Donnie, the insurgents, and all the sycophants in the US Congress who were, in his words, “perfectly content to ride the wave of venom” that Donnie unleashed on his own country and its people. It’s absolutely indispensable listening, and worth every minute.
Happy New Year, by the way. I missed you, too. Now, back to our irregularly scheduled rant:
HOW DAMN HARD IS IT (she yelled, sorry) FOR A GROWN-ASS MAN TO JUST OPEN A DAMN CAN OF BEANS FOR HIS HUNGRY KID? For that matter, HOW DAMN HARD IS IT TO JUST SHOW HER HOW TO WORK A DAMN CAN OPENER SO SHE CAN FEED HERSELF?
Even though she’s nine years old, and quite capable of understanding simple instructions, do you think he can just take a minute or two out from fiddling with his fucking jigsaw puzzle and give her them?
NOPE.
He can’t do it without expecting her to suddenly turn into some kind of miniature mechanical engineer. He can’t do it without punishing her for her apparent lack of inherent mechanical aptitude by telling her all kinds of goddamn fucking stupid fish stories. And oh yeah, he can’t do it without TWEETING THE WHOLE IDIOTIC SAGA TO AN UNDESERVING INTERNET.
Yeah, that’s right. That shitty person can’t even feed his poor hungry kid without making a literal production out of it, starving and humiliating and boring her by turns, and then writing the dumbest Twitter essay ever, and boring us and making us feel vicariously embarrassed for her in turn. (No doubt he was expecting the Twitterati to lap it all uncritically up. HooooBOY,was HE wrong.)
And this was supposed to be a lesson in critical thinking and mechanical competence, supposedly couched as problem-solving and/or survival skills? One wonders what third-rate School of Hard Knocks™ graduated Dear Ol’ Dad here. (All Schools of Hard Knocks™ are third-rate, BTW.)
But wait! You thought this saga was dumb? It gets dumber…
And uglier:
And then, it gets better:
Maybe, if his kid is lucky, she’ll one day get to live with someone who actually cares about her, and not stupid jigsaw puzzles, or some idiot podcast, or scoring right-wing ideological points on the internet. Someone, maybe, who isn’t going to belabor her with irrelevant shit in lieu of, you know, JUST HELPING HER FIX A PROPER FUCKING MEAL.
Back in the 1940s and ’50s, a spectre was haunting young people the world over. Its formal name was poliomyelitis, but it was informally known as “infantile paralysis”, because of its propensity to afflict the very young. For many, it was actually a killer. For others, it fell in varying degrees of severity, from asymptomatic or barely detectable to downright paralytic.
My own grandfather had it as a young man in northern Germany; he had a mild case, but it left him with a crippled foot. His toes were curled under due to shortening of the tendons in his sole; they had to be cut so that he could walk again. The slight resultant disability kept him out of the military — which was fine by him, as he wanted no part in that fiasco. But very near the end of Hitler’s disastrous war, when, while still in a hospital bed after a follow-up treatment, he was visited by stern-faced military recruiters, he “volunteered” to join the Kriegsmarine. It was that or be conscripted by the Wehrmacht and sent to the eastern front. If you got sent east, you went to Siberia and never returned. He couldn’t walk without limping, so long marches were out of the question, but he could drive a horse-drawn supply wagon, so that was what he did. Until the British front passed over Nordrhein-Westfalen, he drove a team of horses, supplying the German navy.
When the front passed over and he knew the war was lost, Opa let the horses run, and himself began the long walk back home to his family — his wife, and four small children. Once, as he rested at the foot of a big tree, a gang of hostile Russians — former POWs, who had often worked on farms in the area during the war — confronted him. They thought he was a soldier, and that his limp was due to a war injury; he had to convince them that he wasn’t, and it wasn’t. Had he not succeeded, they might have killed him. (Such revenge-killings, near war’s end, were disturbingly commonplace.) Another time, unable to run, he had to dig himself into a manure pile to hide from the British army as they rolled through the countryside, looking for stragglers to capture and take prisoner; the farmer, who had seen him, gave him some old work clothes and helped him dispose of the uniform. Once dressed as a civilian farmhand, he was safe, and made it home undetected — a deserter with a pronounced limp, but free, and alive.
After the war, however, a new generation of youngsters fell victim to polio. Not all of them lived in iron lungs. Scott Young, a journalist in Omemee, Ontario, wrote a short but moving account of his son’s battle with the disease, not long after the boy’s recovery. He included it in his memoir, Neil and Me. It was later excerpted in Reader’s Digest, under the title “One of God’s Requestmen”. Yes, Neil Young is a polio survivor…fortunately, one who didn’t end up paralyzed (or even with a clubbed foot like my grandpa), though he did spend some time at Sick Kids in Toronto, in an isolation ward with what he later called “the worst cold I ever had”. He grew up to become a rock star, a versatile super-talent who was equally adept in folk, rockabilly, and even early-’80s synth-pop and ’90s grunge. (His synth-infused album Trans, released in early 1982, was what turned me into a fan of his. I roller-skated in endless, foot-crossing circles on the driveway with his robotic remake of his classic from his Buffalo Springfield days, “Mr. Soul”, playing in my head as I recovered from an injury that had landed me in Sick Kids for 2 1/2 weeks the previous winter.)
And in the political sphere, other prominent Canadians who also survived the disease became advocates for the sick and disabled. Paul Martin Sr., who became a leading Liberal and federal health minister, was blind in one eye and partially paralyzed by polio; the condition made him that much more determined to do his job well. His son, Paul Jr., who eventually became prime minister, also contracted the disease, although he was left with no lingering ill effects. And David Onley, who grew up to become a TV reporter (he did his job with the help of a mobility scooter) and later, became the first visibly disabled lieutenant-governor of Ontario, is another polio survivor. CTV tells their stories here:
In the mid-1950s, the Salk and Sabin vaccines would end up banishing the spectre of polio from the developed world; schoolkids lined up to receive their shot (or their sugar cube, depending on which version of the vaccine they got.) Infection rates dropped to near zero. The dreadful visions of iron lungs, leg braces, and child-sized wheelchairs gradually faded.
Today, polio is seen mainly in still-developing countries. The danger of a comeback here is low, but it could increase dramatically if antivaxxers gain enough influence, and if enough credulous parents fail to learn from our past.
And now, with several COVID-19 vaccines in development, the spectre that is currently haunting us could soon be banished, too. Most of the projections I’ve seen would have large-scale roll-outs of the COVID shot coming as early as the first quarter of 2021. Our government is already committed to supplying enough doses for the entire country. Hope is on the horizon. Rates of infection, currently climbing again, must drop, and drop soon.
But this spectre, like that of polio, won’t go away unless we all get that shot in the arm.
Fear doesn't travel well; just as it can warp judgment, its absence can diminish memory's truth. What terrifies one generation is likely to bring only a puzzled smile to the next.
--Arthur Miller, "Why I Wrote 'The Crucible'", The New Yorker, October 21, 1996
All opinions here are the brain-wrackings of Sabina C. Becker, unless otherwise credited. If you cite them, please give credit where due.