Festive Left Friday Blogging: Evo is definitely on his feed

As his re-election campaign closes, a critical question looms: Is Evo corny?

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Or is he just full of beans?

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You decide…

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Chávez says basta to bad bankers; warns of banker-generated coup

Video in Spanish. Aporrea has more:

President Hugo Chávez called upon bank customers yesterday to maintain calm and not give in to rumors which, according to him, are meant to generate a run on the banks with the end purpose of “toppling Chávez”.

“Pay no attention to those attacks, because what they’re trying to do is create alarm […] It all came out on the Internet, by phone, and so on. They’re looking for what’s known as a run on the banks, and they think they’ll topple Chávez with that. I repeat, the only thing that’s going to fall here is the private banking system, not Chávez. Don’t be fooled, it will backfire on them,” said the president during the graduation ceremony for the eighth cohort of Mission Ribas, broadcast from the Teresa Carreño theatre.

Chávez reminded listeners that the government is acting “against a group of banks whose owners could not show where they had gotten all that money. Right up to now they couldn’t do it, and that’s their job,” he said, referring to the liquidated Banco Canarias and BanPro, and the also bailed-out Bolívar and Confederado banks.

Chávez warned that “we have another banking chain on our radar […] and you may be sure that if I’m obliged to intervene in all the private banks of Venezuela, I’ll do it. Let there be no doubt.”

Chávez called on private bankers to take care and comply with the law. “I’m keeping an eye on them, because private banking has degenerated into a chain of mechanisms and instead of doing their jobs, the banks are specializing in financial speculation.”

The president decreed an end to the hegemony of private banks, and announced the creation of a “real public financial system”, although he did not give more details.

Translation mine; linkage added.

Well, let’s see if Chavecito doesn’t improvise something nifty on the fly. He’s very good at that; the ALBA, among other things, was an improvisation of his, which he came out with at the spur of the moment during a speech about the need to kill the ALCA (the Spanish acronym of the FTAA, or Free Trade Area of the Americas) during the 2005 summit at Mar del Plata, Argentina. ALCA is now officially DOA, so we know he wasn’t talking out his ass on that one. (Sorry, Otto, but you’re a little off base when you say the man doesn’t do finance well. He does; he just doesn’t do it the capitalist way. He certainly knew how to kill a bad done deal dead!)

Swami ‘Bina predicts that Chavecito will probably turn the recuperated banks into credit unions once the depositors get their looted money back. Meaning, citizens will be actual shareholders and managers of their own cash, instead of just victims “customers” like they’ve been until now. If they can do it with local water councils and co-op businesses, they should be able to do it with banks, no problemo.

She also predicts that Chavecito will stand firm, and it will be the bankers who finally back down when they see he means business. And the bucks-to-bolivars exchange rates will drop right back to their old levels when that happens (and the warned-of putsch doesn’t).

BTW: That other man in the video is Jorge Giordani, Chavecito’s planning minister. This is how Swami ‘Bina comes by her assertion that Chavecito is serious this time. Giordani is a serious man, and he’s been Chavecito’s right hand on a lot of key things. Look for him to be heading up the committee to get ‘er done.

Just for fun, and further proof, here’s another video:

…in which Chavecito puts his childhood business experience as a papaya-candy seller to good illustrative use.

We’ll see who’s more right on this one, Otto or me…all in good fun, of course. This won’t be about money, but just to see who’s the better prognosticator. Get your turban on, amigo!

PS: Further interesting viewing here. Mario Silva dissects it all rather nicely. David Icke you can ignore if you like, or just take him with a grain of salt. But Mario’s analysis is the real thing, and it’s especially good in the second segment, where he rips El Matacuras a new one.

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Short ‘n’ Stubby: Bummerama

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Maybe I should have used a pic of a Rumpy Manx instead of this Stumpie? You tell me…

The UK Sun is all agush with the “news” that oil has been “discovered” (again!) in the Falklands/Malvinas/whatever those little rocks in the South Atlantic are really called. The Financial Times puts the kibosh on that bosh, pointing out that it’s not really worth drilling for. Bummer.

It’s getting harder to be a homophobe in New York State when senators like this awesome woman are making such brilliant speeches that just totally take the piss out of you. At this rate, they WILL get same-sex marriage, and soon.

It really must suck, though, to be married to Tiger Woods. Why is nobody hounding him for singlehandedly wrecking traditional marriage? Oh yeah, I think I know…

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Or in this case, a whole gaggle of little idiots. “Traditional” marriage, in short, is a real bummer.

It must also really suck to be Lou Dobbs. Old, hateful, petulant and grumpy–and ever more in the wrong. Oh dear!

Afghanistan’s bummer elections have changed Cenk Uygur’s heart. Better late than never, I suppose!

Ad photos retouched? Say it ain’t so! And, bummer for those who would deceive us in order to sell us overpriced crap: A French legislator wants to make sure everyone knows it.

And finally, a rude awakening for those who idolize Victoria’s Secret models: Yep, they’re retouched too. Diet, exercise, surgery–and that ain’t all. They have 20 layers of makeup all over everything, including their tushes. Bummer!

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No great harm without some gain

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Well, it looks like Amy Goodman’s run-in with our meshuga border goons has not been a total bust. Her book, which she was in BC to promote, is now a bona-fide bestseller, if this note from her publisher (Haymarket) that landed in my mailbox is any indicator:

Featuring overflow audiences, as covered by the Los Angeles Times and Mail Tribune, hundreds of people across the country have been “Going Goodman” instead of “Going Rogue,” listening to stories from Breaking the Sound Barrier, that put in the place of the usual suspects, voices and viewpoints the corporate media exclude and ignore — a model which clearly caught the attention of the Canadian Border Patrol, who outrageously detained, questioned, and searched Goodman for over 90 minutes this Thanksgiving, over fear of what she may say about the Vancouver 2010 Olympics.

And unlike the Paliness’s poo-pile, Amy’s book will not be a “daggered” entry on the bestseller lists. Nor will it become a “featured” giveaway with any book club’s introductory offers. It’s gonna go on selling steadily on the basis of its own considerable merits.

Congrats, Amy, it couldn’t happen to a more deserving soul!

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Short ‘n’ Stubby: Hell on Wheels edition

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Wanda Sykes takes on Tiger Woods. He better be thankful she doesn’t play golf, because this smart funny lady never misses.

A certain Canadian mining company claims to be in business to benefit the indigenous people of Mexico, but a dead anti-mining organizer could tell you very differently, if he’d only lived. Y’see, he was shot by goons–hired by said company. Oh yeah, and he’s indigenous, if his photo’s anything to go by. Muchas gracias to Otto for that one. (All the more reason for Parliament to require Canadian companies doing business abroad to export the social responsibility we expect of them here at home, no?)

Wanna see Chavecito get adorable? Watch the first minute or two of the second segment here. Spanish only, but the adorability requires no translation.

For the Sally Ann, it seems that “illegal” kids are less needy than others, and therefore less deserving of a toy. Never mind that the US economy would have collapsed sooner if not for the virtual slavery of these kids’ parents. No, they don’t deserve anything, just because their folks crossed the Rio Grande without puppy-papers…and rich capitalists are taking advantage of that very fact.

Anti-farcist Hondurans are flashing the finger to demonstrate that they didn’t vote. (It’s the LITTLE finger, gutterminds!) Muchas gracias to Cort G. for that one.

The National Security Archive in Washington, DC, has presented several evidentiary documents, including a verified “death squad diary”, to the Spanish courts for use in the trials of several Guatemalan military thugs. Looks like impunity’s about to end for the genocidal leaders of the 80s, at least the local ones. Now, how about their gringo handlers?

The new puppet of Honduras talks tough at Chavecito, but remains suspiciously silent toward the real troublemaker, namely Lula.

BTW, there was NO legal basis for removing Mel from office. Are any of the apologists out there aware of that? It means the Honduran “election” was illegitimate. Period.

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Teh Heterostoopid: Stupidity outwits natural selection, for now

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Please, stop him before he makes another one!

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Short ‘n’ Stubby: Snips, snaps and snark

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It’s World AIDS Day, and to celebrate, Uganda’s government is mulling a bill to mandate the death penalty for gay sex. The driving influence? “Evangelicals from abroad”, according to one Anglican bishop. These same evangelicals and their parliamentary buddies are no doubt the same ones who are screaming about Hugo Chávez for not bad-mouthing Idi Amin. Hypocrites much?

BTW, Gwynne Dyer’s piece on prudishness in Africa, and how it’s costing lives, is a must-read.

It’s now official: Dubai is in deep doodoo. (Literally–among other things, they’re awash in their own shit. Despite all their expensive building projects, sewage treatment plants were rather low on the list of priorities.) They’re claiming that their debt crisis (soon to become a default) is really a “standstill”, but who’s fooling whom? The only way they’re gonna pay this one off in the end is by taking on more debt elsewhere when Abu Dhabi gets sick of sinking money into this bottomless pit. Where are the IMF and the World Bank when you need ’em? This sort of thing is right up their alley.

Oh, and get this: Dubai also claims it’s not responsible for running up its huge debts–the creditors are, for lending them the money! Chutzpah–it’s an Emirati thing, apparently.

Truthdig gets to the bottom of the US’s stupid celebrity “reality” obsessions, and comes up with a real nugget. Hint: It’s not about reality at all, unless you’re talking about the evasion thereof.

(All the same, I can’t help wondering if Tiger Woods really did crash his car at low speed because he was banging this human trainwreck. Embarrassing, but can it be helped when the episode is getting saturation coverage and even in Canada, you can’t get away from it? And WTF is this mytho-poetic shit?)

Finding Dulcinea waffles a bit about Chavecito’s sinister Maoist cloud-seeding plan, while conceding that Venezuela IS suffering from an El Niño-induced drought, and also managing not to blame that on Big Red You Know Who OR ridicule his admonitions to conserve water and hydro power. Progress nohow contrariwise, I guess.

Only in Italy do the police drive Lamborghinis–and crash them. Too much espresso, I guesso.

Argentine same-sex wedding denied! The would-be cock-blocker: A federal judge. Undeterred, the happy couple say they’ll try again tomorrow.

John Demjanjuk is trying to use his failing health to get out of being tried for crimes against humanity. One wonders if he granted any such clemency to those whom it was his job to kill on behalf of Hitler. One guesses not. (One also notes that Augusto Pinochet used a similar strategy, to great effect; he died unpunished in 2006.)

Brazil still categorically refuses to recognize the bogus election in Honduras. Lula clearly doesn’t give a shit for that old good left/bad left distinction anymore.

A former Miss Argentina gives her life to illustrate why the best thing a woman can do with her butt is buy flattering clothes and leave it the hell alone. RIP, Solange Magnano.

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Welcome to Reality, Chuck…

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You know things are getting bad for fascism when prominent rats start leaving the ship.

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Stupid Sex Tricks: Anybody for a little refried sausage?

Mexican cooking just got a whole lot spicier, thanks to someone who is VERY hearing-impaired:

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Don’t you just love closed captioning sometimes?

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Exclusive! New drug developed in Gringolandia!

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Its commercial name, in English, is Idongivadam, and it’s apparently related to Damnitol and Fukitol. According to Globoterror,

It is made from the extract of a plant grown on the island of Borneo, and mixed with opium from liberated Afghanistan and a tiny dose of supermarijuana from various domestic plantations in the states of Ohio and Arkansas.

Side effects include slight dizziness, pains in the neck, excessive intestinal gas, post-coital hallucinations, talkativeness, uncontrolled laughter, nightmares, urinary inhibition, heart palpitations, pain in the left arm, oppression of the chest, pre-infarct, post-infarct and rigor mortis.

Just the thing for the oppos in Venezuela and Bolivia who have trouble accepting the will of the uppity peasants. Hooray!

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Posted in All About Evo, Huguito Chavecito, She Blinded Me With Science, The WTF? Files | 2 Comments